Need for joy

If I choose the route of hardening, I may also find that I need many compensations, more toys, more money, more power, a bigger house, more houses, a job with more status, bigger and better addictions, new accomplishments that demand I work harder and harder, become ever more "responsible" and smarter than others in order to assuage my own personal but unacknowledged need for joy. And there it is, I've said everything I know about self-care: it is a need, not a preference, not an add-on. It is a necessity for life. And if the need for joy is not accessed, it will come back in a different form, as a symptom.

Oestreich Associates: Third Practice: Caring for Self.