I need to think of another name for my phone

I increasingly use my phone for text and e-mail communication only - I can access gmail easily from anywhere in the world and the wonderful Spinvox converts all of my voice-mails to texts.

In contrast voice calls take up time, prevent me from doing other things, are more expensive, can be confusing and frustrating when dealing with poor line quality and foreign accents and are generally inefficient!

Like Matt just said "it's capable of voice, but i'm disabling that function"

So what am I going to call the damn thing ...